|
|
Riddles
Free Kids Riddles
Many of these riddles are over 100 years old! It's
amazing how what is funny today was funny yesterday. Now some of the
riddles need to be slightly altered to fit the current day.
Why are weary people like car wheels? Answer: Because they are tired.
An old woman in a red cloak was passing a field in which a goat was feeding. What strange transformation suddenly took place? Answer: The goat turned to butter (butt her), and the woman into a scarlet runner.
Why does a duck go into the water? Answer: For divers reasons.
Spell "blind pig" in two letters. P G; a pig without an I.
Which bird can lift the heaviest weights? The crane.
Why is a wise man like a pin? He has a head and comes to a point.
Why is a Jew in a fever like a diamond? Because he is a Jew-ill.
Why may carpenters reasonably believe there is no such thing as stone? Because they never saw it.
What is that which is put on the table and cut, but never eaten? A pack of cards.
When does a farmer double up a sheep without hurting it? When he folds it.
What lives upon its own substance and dies when it has devoured itself? A candle.
Why is a dog biting his tail like a good manager? Because he makes both ends meet.
What thing is it that is lower with a head than without one? A pillow.
Which is the left side of a plum pudding? That which is not eaten.
What letter of the alphabet is necessary to make a shoe? The last.
If all the seas were dried up, what would everybody say? We haven't a notion (an ocean).
Why is it certain that "Uncle Tom's Cabin" was not written by the hand of its reputed author? Because it was written by Mrs. Beecher's toe (Stowe).
Why is a fishmonger never generous? Because his business makes him sell fish (selfish).
What is that which works when it plays and plays when it works? A fountain.
What is that from which you may take away the whole and yet there will be some remaining? The word wholesome.
Why are fowls the most economical things a farmer can keep? Because for every grain they give a peck.
Why is it dangerous to walk in the meadows in springtime? Because the trees are shooting and the bulrush is out (bull rushes out).
Why is a vine like a soldier? Because it is listed and has ten drills (tendrils) and shoots.
If a man who is carrying a dozen glass lamps drops one, what does he become? A lamp lighter.
What belongs to yourself, but is used more by your friends than by yourself? Your name.
A man had twenty sick (six) sheep and one died; how many were left? Nineteen.
Which is the best day for making a pancake? Friday.
What is that which everybody has seen but will never see again? Yesterday.
What four letters would frighten a thief? O I C U.
Why is a spider a good correspondent? Because he drops a line at every post.
When is the clock on the stairs dangerous? When it runs down.
Why is the letter "k" like a pig's tail? Because it comes at the end of pork.
What is the keynote to good manners? B natural.
Why is a five dollar bill much more profitable than five silver dollars? Because when you put it in your pocket you double it, and when you take it out you will find it in-creases.
Why is a watch like a river? Because it doesn't run long without winding.
What is that which flies high, flies low, has no feet, and yet wears shoes? Dust.
Which is the smallest bridge in the world? The bridge of your nose.
When has a man four hands? When he doubles his fists.
What trees has fire no effect upon? Ash trees; because when they are burned they are ashes still.
What is the difference between a schoolmaster and an engine-driver? One minds the train and the other trains the mind.
What is that which goes from Chicago to Philadelphia without moving? The road.
Which is easier to spell—fiddle-de-dee or fiddle-de-dum? Fiddle-de-dee, because it is spelled with more "e's."When may a chair be said to dislike you? When it can't bear you.
What animal took most luggage into the Ark, and which two took the least? The elephant, who took his trunk, while the fox and the cock had only a brush and a comb between them.
If a bear were to go into a dry goods store, what would he want? He would want muzzlin'.
Why was the first day of Adam's life the longest? Because it had no Eve.
Why is a washerwoman like a navigator? Because she spreads her sheets, crosses the line and goes from pole to pole.
Why is it that a tailor won't attend to business? Because he is always cutting out.
When can a horse be sea-green in color? When it's a bay.
Why were gloves never meant to sell? Because they were made to be kept on hand.
When are we all artists? When we draw a long face.
Why are watch-dogs bigger by night than by day? Because they are let out at night and taken in in the morning.
[pg 73]
Why is B like a hot fire? Because it makes oil Boil.
Why is a schoolmaster like a bootblack? Because he polishes the understandings of the people.
When is a store-keeper always above his business? When he lives over his store.
Which is the liveliest city in the world? Berlin; because it's always on the Spree.
Why is a water-lily like a whale? Because they both come to the surface to blow.
Why is a shoemaker the most industrious of men? Because he works to the last.
What is book-keeping? Forgetting to return borrowed volumes.
Why is scooping out a turnip a noisy process? Because it makes it hollow.
Why are teeth like verbs? Because they are regular, irregular, and defective.
What ships hardly ever sail out of sight? Hardships.
When is an artist a dangerous person? When his designs are bad.
Why are tortoiseshell combs like citadels? They are for-tresses.
Why is the Isthmus of Suez like the first "u" in cucumber? Because it is between two "c's" (seas).
What motive led to the invention of railroads? The loco-motive.
Why are deaf people like Dutch cheeses? Because you can't make them here.
When is the best time to get a fresh egg at sea? When the ship lays to.
Who was the first whistler? The wind.
Why need a traveler never starve in the desert? Because of the sand which is (sandwiches) there.
Why is sympathy like blindman's buff? Because it is a fellow feeling for a fellow creature.
If a Frenchman were to fall into a tub of tallow, in what word would he express his situation? In-de-fat-i-gabble. (Indefatigable.)
Why is a dinner on board a steamboat like Easter Day? Because it is a movable feast.
Spell "enemy" in three letters. F O E.
[pg 74]
Why is a little man like a good book? Because he is often looked over.
Why is a pig in a parlor like a house on fire? Because the sooner it is put out the better.
What is the difference between a soldier and a bombshell? One goes to wars, the other goes to pieces.
Which is the only way that a leopard can change his spots? By going from one spot to another.
Why did Eve never fear the measles? Because she'd Adam.
When is a tall man a little short? When he hasn't got quite enough cash.
What houses are the easiest to break into? The houses of bald people; because their locks are few.
Why is a watch the most difficult thing to steal? Because it must be taken off its guard.
Why is there never anybody at home in a convent? Because it is an (n) uninhabited place.
Why does a person who is not good looking make a better carpenter than one who is? Because he is a deal plainer.
What is the best tree for preserving order? The birch.
Why is shoemaking the easiest of trades? Because the shoes are always soled before they are made.
What plant stands for No. 4? IV.
How can a gardener become thrifty? By making the most of his thyme, and by always putting some celery in the bank.
Why is it probable that beer was made in the ark? Because the kangaroo went in with hops, and the bear was always bruin.
"What was the biggest thing you saw at the Panama Exposition?" asked a wife of her husband. "My hotel bill!" said he.
Why is C like a schoolmistress? Because it forms lasses into classes.
What is that which never asks any questions and yet requires many answers? The street door.
If a man bumped his head against the top of a room, what article of stationery would he be supplies with? Ceiling whacks (sealing-wax).
Which is the oldest tree in the country? The elder tree.
Which is the longest word in the English language? Smiles; because there is a mile between the first and last letters.
What is that which happens twice in a moment and not once in a thousand years? The letter M.
How many sides are there to a tree? Two, inside and out.
What sea would a man most like to be in on a wet day? A dry attic (Adriatic).
Why is coffee like an axe with a dull edge? Because it must be ground before it is used.
What is the difference between a bottle of medicine and a troublesome boy? One is to be well shaken before taken, and the other is to be taken and then shaken.
What makes more noise than a pig under a gate? Two pigs.
When is a door not a door? When it is a-jar.
What is the difference between a naughty boy and a postage stamp? Because one you stick with a lick, and the other you lick with a stick.
Why did William Tell shudder when he shot the apple from his son's head? Because it was an arrow escape for his child.
What is that which the more you take from it the larger it grows? A hole.
What is the best land for little kittens? Lapland.
Why should a man always wear a watch when he travels in a waterless desert? Because every watch has a spring in it.
Of what trade is the sun? A tanner.
What relation is a doormat to a door? Step-fa(r)ther.
What is that which you cannot hold ten minutes, although it is as light as a feather? Your breath.
What is the worst weather for rats and mice? When it rains cats and dogs.
What is that which never uses its teeth for eating purposes? A comb.
When are two apples alike? When pared.
What is the difference between a blind man and a sailor in prison? One cannot see to go and the other cannot go to sea.
Why is a plum cake like the ocean? Because it contains so many currants.
What pudding makes the best cricketer? A good batter.
When is a sailor not a sailor? When he's a-board.
Why is the snow different from Sunday? Because it can fall on any day in the week.
What trade would you mention to a short boy? Grow sir (grocer).
What tree is nearest the sea? The beech.
Why is a game of cards like a timber yard? Because there are always a great many deals in it.
Why is a tight boot like an oak tree? Because it produces a corn (acorn).
Why is a city in Ireland likely to be the largest city in the world? Because each year it is Dublin (doubling).
What is the easiest way to swallow a door? Bolt it.
Why is a dancing master like a tree? Because of his bows (boughs).
Name a word of five letters from which if you take two but "one" remains. Stone.
Why is A like twelve o'clock? It is the middle of "day"
When is a man thinner than a lath? When he is a-shaving.
More Free
Kids Birthday Games and Birthday Party
Supplies
|
